i am so afraid to go to the bathroom. i am afraid i am going to fall asleep on the toillet.
Special does not even begin to describe that text.
Dude, I just had an awesome rave/orgy with like bunch of hot Asian chicks on a cable car. It was like being in a Gwen Stefani video, cept w/o the bad spelling
God, I love San Francisco.
the best part about tonight...knowing when i wake up in the morning his car will still be full of packing peanuts..and mine wont
So you coming over for some grilled cheese and head?
Fuck morning classes. Fuck early work. Fuck anything in the morning that doesn't involve sleeping, sex or bacon.
He woke up screaming about pickles. I think it's gonna be a good day.
You'd be so proud. I have the flu/sore throat, so I've tied a scarf around my head and I'm microwaving jagerbombs. Let it never be said I'm not commited.
Lets get coked out and steal a parrot this summer
not even kidding I just received the single most greatest head I have ever had.. It was unreal. It was like stick my dick into a silk bag of puppy ears.
Your exhaustion is probably due to your rampant sexual urges and the fact that you live the same life as a raccoon.
There was a trampoline and tequila. It was glorious.
he said we should drink responsibly and we all just kinda sat there laughing at him
He slapped my ass... He best ask me out. Or figure out how to unslap my ass.
I wish my nipples were as well behaved as yours.
sorry for running off in the middle of that heart to heart. free food.
Randomize
