sometimes you just have to masturbate at your friend's house.
i love how he claims to not know english but when i ask him to come over and fuck me he's all of a sudden fluent
i leave for school in 3 days. if you want your annual goodbye blow job you should probably call me
im gonna call it quits for tonight... I am so drunk I dont even have the motor skills to masturbate
Well yes but because of that incident i now salute to truck drivers
I would totally lead with that as a line.'So, I was on Legends of the Hidden temple as a kid.. Your place or mine?'
Is it too early to start pregaming for St. Patty's?
he told me to take care of him and then he asked me to walk him to his hotel. I already have a pussy. I don't need another one
Today I learned I and my bar naps were the subject of a bar meeting.
Drink drank drunk tankkkkn, LETS GO
I'll just bring the big suitcase this trip so I don't have to play wine bottle tetris again.
I just wiped cum off my face with baby wipes... #momlife
It's almost like he's actually taking my commentary and criticism to heart, but simultaneously succumbing to some primal urge to wear less clothing each time.
Nah, i wasn't offended. Having a bridesmaid who you had had multiple threesomes with your future husband would be weird.
He made me cum 3 times, then immediately after sex packed a bowl and passed it to me. Yeah.. I'll keep him.
Randomize
