I hate you, and I hope you have babies soon that you love very much. Then I will steal them and feed them to sharks, and you will be so heart broken that you never want to have any more kids and you'll just hide out in a dark room all day wondering how someone could feed another persons babies to sharks.
she would be the type to have more hair on her twat than on her head
she has to be all "alternative"
She's legit crying about wanting more sex. Holy shit.
reaaaally cool. my cat ate my birth control.
Please tell me this is my four loko that I just woke up in....
i think the penis that was inside of me changed my life
Nothing is more important than the last pool party of the season. Call in sick or gay or something.
we've decided whoever is stupid enough to use the condom that's tacked to the wall deserves to get pregnant.
I just commented on the education level of his penis.
GOVERNMENT SHUTDOWN NO RULES ICE CREAM FOR BREAKFAST woooo!
YOU LICKED MY MAKEUP OFF.
I just tripped over a but plug that was on the floor. It's 430 in the morning
Yeah we've been texting but I don't know how to just randomly throw in sooo the real reason this is happening is because i hear you're a drug dealer
The closest thing I've had to an orgasm lately is sneezing nonstop from fucking allergies.
Last night I was the DD and was trying to drop off some chick I didn't know at her place. The closest thing to an address I got was "where the goldfish go."
Randomize
