This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
yeah, i liked him til i heard he had a sac that could apparently smother my face.
Either he has two lazy eyes or he really likes my tits..
handjob tips. give me some.
He is drunkenly eating my teddy grahms and making little growling noises as he bites the head off of each one.
You covered in salsa con queso would take care of all of my cravings right now
i feel like you're just hanging onto the edge of functioning wino.
She came to the party dressed as slutty elmo and then called me oscar the grouch for not wanting to bang her in the dumpster outside.
she is way to in-touch with her childhood
He pulled out, and the resulting cumstain on my sheets is in the shape of a fetus. The irony of this is both awesome and terrifying.
we played dirty jenga the drinking edition... some girl really just broke a rib? how do we even go this hard
I think they were making kool-aid in my bed. There is lots of sugar and my hands and face are stained blue.
My puffy vagina and I are on the way to the doctor to see what your mutant penis did to us THANKS A LOT
The dick pic bandit just sent me a poem about showering..
Also, if you don't fuck me soon, I will die. I don't want to die like that.
He was actually surprised when I poured myself a glass full of straight vodka. Clearly he doesn't know me as well as he thinks.
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