no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
you dont remember trying to break dance in the middle of the casino floor on ur own throw up?
oh that explains alot.
You kept making up "snapple facts" every time you opened a beer.
oh my god. the driver of our party bus just said "no drugs unless you're sharin," my confidence in him is not high at the moment
All I have done at work today is eat and try to get my coworker to tie me to his bed again
I went from naked with lasts nights hookup to Ihop in 6 minutes flat
I think that's a new house record
Is the mullet a good, great, or horrible idea before we leave for college
Getting drunk in an Applebee's pray for me
Lord god protect this child
I feel like I'm in a development meeting for a Lifetime original movie.
he really is such a sweet guy. it’s a shame i have to break his heart.
Do you own a cuff key and know where Karen lives?
What am I thankful for..I figured out I can drink on antibiotics without getting sick thanks to the power of pot gummies
the cop said "drunk and disorderly" like it was a bad thing
I love how when he said ecstasy pills both of our heads whipped around like a couple of horned owls.
Sorry for face licking, I probably won't do it again.
Also, I love cats. I sat on the floor and they sat with me.
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