Every time we go downtown I ask myself why we live in Des Moines
If Rob Pattinson gets another fucking MTV award, I'm going to vomit.
That was definitely a porn plot just waiting to develop...
And he showed us your test. You wrote what is this shit and scribbled on it? Nice 3%..
She told me I had to leave by four. We fucked until six thirty and we are the champions played on the way home. Yeah god knew
I feel like he knows I had a dream about him eating me out in the janitors closet at the holiday party. He's giving me THAT look.
On an unrelated note: I'm also a big advocate of the "never waste a boner" theory.
You have dresses for different occasions. I need different men's dicks too. It's logic.
Is it too early to start pregaming for St. Patty's?
He asked if I had feelings for him while I was lying naked on the floor vomiting into a trashcan as he held my hair and fed me Pringles.
Please write a memoir and name it "Game Boy and Dick Stuff"
Did you get any pics? And I can only imagine how inferior you must have felt knowing that somewhere in that room was a guy whose penis was the length of your forearm.
I stopped for beer and woke up to a bird on my shoulder. I really need to stop drinking
We have a shopping cart in our front lawn. Also Mickey D's breakfast?
You start to question your morals when you wake up at 430 and there's three people naked...that you don't no
Randomize
