Mental picture: Us at a bar keeping it classy shot gunning PBR's in the corner.
That was a good example of when keeping it real goes right
She said she didn't think she should have to shave either. Guess no shave November just became no sex November.
Some dude at the gas station right now is buying a 30 rack of beast and a can of cat food. Happy Thanksgiving.
Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
i wrote her a fucking poem. i better get laid for that
You do realize that you're sleeping with a man who is part of a gay harem, right?
Hate sex is good. Drunk sex is better. Combine those two however and you get the best experience of your LIFE.
If it makes you feel any better about life I'm wearing yoga pants with granny panties and toms with socks cause fuck my life
Just woke up in my fuck buddies bed with, from the looks of her ass and side boob, a girl that is not my fuck buddy. This should be interesting
well a fat roach just fell out of my hair. so there's that
I just woke up naked next to a GetGo sandwich and I can hear my cats are eating my combos. So that's my life.
I woke up naked buried in snacks. Best night ever.
Somehow I became in charge of getting my mother laid? This can't be my life? Lol
It's beautiful and huge. Like a dinosaur.
Woke up at my x's house. He said I talked about how much I love panda's for fourty five minutes. Then made him watch The Little Mermaid with me. Made the walk of shame infront of his mom. Things can only really go up from here.
Wait till you get home.
Randomize
