Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
remind me next year to leave the 19 year old girl at home when you're going to pride. total cock block
she takes plan B like it's going out of style
I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
my roommate just showed up covered in dirt, drunk....with a whole ice cream cake that says "it's a girl".
There is a newly found video on my phone of me following you to the bathroom to watch you throw up. sorry I didn't hold your hair
you can't wake me up at 4am to suck your dick and then give me a high five at the bar
Oh dude, thanks for giving me that liquor last night, except replace 'giving' with 'violently forcing'.
i also took my stockings off in the bathroom and blew my nose with them in the cab ride home. james was appalled
I'm sitting with my parents watching football and moaned when I saw his shirtless picture. They looked at me weird so I had to turn the moan into a laugh. A sad, really horny laugh.
Today, I lack passion for anything but Taco Tuesday.
Slap a cop in the butt for a felony charge. Check.
This is like a walk of shame down memory lane.
I'm drunk but I just ate 2 heads of broccoli so does that mean it evens out?
Yes absolutlely
Dude, you fell into a tree, and both of the tables, AND the window well... Resilient aren't you?
Randomize
