i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
I just used my 2 drink stirrers as chopsticks to get a lime out of my drink. I really am Asian.
I feel like hell. The amount of black beans I found in my hair tells me I hit rock bottom
He's having sex with his gf again. Every thump of his bed against the wall is insulting to our one night stand.
Did you guys seriously let me trade my id for a kebab last night??
Trying to coordinate a drug deal while taking a psych test is not easy.
If I had a mugshot, I would totally use it as my main picture on Tinder, just to keep it interesting.
I don't send those kind of pictures unless the recipient has already been up close and personal with it. I don't give previews, but I will provide recaps.
why does drunk me think that doing things like throwing up on my desk and all over my 15 page lab report is okay
We played table tennis, but used tv remotes taped to our foreheads instead of paddles. Every time your opponent scored you took a shot. I'm the current champion as of last night.
I know he's gay. But if he touches my vagina I'm human centipeding his face. Sorry not sorry
Crying while I'm pooping. I think this is rock bottom
My sinuses still burn from snorting red wine last night.
My life is in shambles. Just made a grilled cheese in the microwave on a hot dog bun
I just found glitter glue on my jesus bracelet...am I really that gay?
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