So I'm pretty sure when I was giving a Birthday Blow J, he went to grab my boob, but grabbed a fat roll and asked "You're not wearing a bra?"
Whoever said drinking more helps a hangover didn't drink 96% of a fifth of whiskey last night. This is absurd.
I need to talk about my life with someone. Preferably with someone who hasn't tried to jizz on me
Hes still mad that I left the room mid-hookup to go get a pickle from the fridge.
Saw a guy pass out and hit his head on a urinal. Laughing too hard to help him up
The guy in the cast riped the tap off the keg and hit steve with it
We're all in the kiddie pool on the porch. Fully clothed. Watching porn. With my manager.
I have cum and leaves all over me. Don't ask questions.
Second time this week margarita night turned homoerotic
He just stared me dead in the eye as he continued to beat off. Then said "you were going to catch me sooner or later".
Was your wine and cheese snap taken from the toilet?
meanwhile at my house I found 2 bud heavys in the back of my book shelf crammed between a Franklin book and goodnight moon
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
mother daughter bonding time. she's helping me make jello shots.
Then it hit me - his penis wasn't a shiny new toy anymore and I wanted a new one.
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