You realize it's finals week?
Ya that's the school's fault. St. Patrick's day came first.
No one showed up yet so I smoked 4:20 on chatroulette with a naked chick..
It looks like the misc $300 credit card fraud might have been our taxi cab driver who wouldn't take boobs as payment. No wonder...
The vagina on Hilton Head is mighty fine this time of year.
He started doing the gator chop at my vag and said he couldn't wait to "chomp" on it later...and I still slept with him. I hate gainesville.
isnt this the same guy you hooked up with on his birthday and he then asked, "you were at me birthday?" the next time you were together?
I just watched the lion king for the first time in years. It's like the equivalent of a really good blow job.
she looks like one of those semi-pretty girls that turns into a 9 while she's riding your cock like she's trying to catch a train on horseback.
He had a tramp stamp of his own phone number. You can't tell me that isn't smart.
I mean there is a rehab there so its gotta be a good time
This guy on Hoarders just said "we're all about 4 or 5 decisions away from shitting in a bucket". True dat
Can't. I'm doing shots with my mom.
He was wearing a diaper to the party. I've never felt like such a creep in my life.
My vagina still hurts from yesterday. That's the last time I think riding a mop bucket is a good idea. Don't let me do that again
For future reference: bathtub full of cheeseburgers = win.
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