If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
I mean, he was my book buddy in 1st grade. The kid taught me how to read, the least I could do was give him head.
It's like playing clue with my own life. I have to piece together what I did, where I was, how I did it, and who I did it to
Yeah someone just put a trash bag that says "use protection" on the snow penis
If you didn't damage your room so much from fucking so hard we would have got more of our security deposit back
I resent that
True life. I have to get a nose job due to a deviated septum from blowing coke. Thank you college.
just cuz theres a goalie doesnt mean i cant commandeer the goal and become a way better goalie
I'm watching him slurp a whole mango out of her hand. It's disturbingly arousing.
It's ok, I like adventure. Just ask my vagina.
Your message cut off at "shit on the floor". Your life is incredible.
I got whiskey, so I think the blizzard and I are at an even match
I need an inhaler full of pot for all of this breathless rage.
I'm graduating college in 4 days. I already miss the bad decisions
When campus security rolled up he stole their car and drove it like 100 feet. Then he walked up and gave back the keys because it was a hyundai.
she prefaced telling me she was pregnant with "houston, we have a problem"
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