Nob stitches i do do not bleed anymorr!
Espresso. Can't sleep. Love puppies
i've lived in the woods for so long, as long as its post-op, i don't care.
Honestly, where the fuck is osama bin laden?
win or lose for butler, i'm still masturbating to brad stevens tonight
I think you blew our chances when you yelled "YOU SLUTS COMING TO THE TITTIE BAR?" in their face
No flamethrowers. That is a direct order.
im breathing rainbows and everyone is talking in bubbles whatever you gave me give me more
I thought 4 percs were too many but I'm dumping Gogurt on apple pie and taking giant bong rips. This feels right.
you came out with your cock in between the legs of a balloon animal. Maybe she'll think you have a sense of humor.
What kind of balloon animal was it?
Rehydrating your liver back to life is never a good idea.
hes duct taped to the wall and we're throwing eggs at him. i love thirsty thursday.
I found a loose wire in my thermostat. Couldn't find the pliers, so I used a nipple clamp to fix it.
TFW YOU ACCIDENTALLY SEND A MEME ABOUT LIKING ANAL TO THE GROUP CHAT. JESUS FUCKING CHRIST, WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME?
woke up to find a case of beer in the oven and a random puppy in the house...guess i had a party last night?
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