Leaving terminator. dude in front of us leaving was wearing a baggy micael vick jersey, cargo shorts and brown crocs. God I hate people.
I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
I didn't know people actually cried after sex.
Let's go free Charlie Sheen and party with him
I blacked out at the bar, and blcked in getting a handjob on a roller coaster. Sober me is jealous of drunk me.
I would have screamed and cried and bled and shit and then died. Fuck that guy.
I tried to convince the Lobo Card people to take my pic with my sunglasses on because I will probably always be this hungover.
he asked me to lick his asshole and I told him his girlfriend could do that for him
when the washing machine is on all the beer bottles jiggle and clink against each other... "drink us drink us drink us"
If she wants experimental lesbian sex, i call dibs
Fair warning birthday party last night avoid kitchen & upstairs bathroom if you value your remaining sanity
Im like a saiyan, last weekends hangover will only make me stronger
It's sad that I'm more proud of my Twitter account then my resume
My "lord keep me from stabbing a bitch" prayer has gotten a lot of miles today
Theres a handprint of sauce on my fridge, one on my face, and a trail of it leading to my bedroom, and sauce all in my bed, and I have no idea what the fuck i ate.
Randomize