You know, if there were no such thing as marriage, i don't think porn would exist.
sometimes i wonder what i would do without sheltered catholic girls w/ overprotective parents
never have sex?
Puked in a cab. Passed out on my floor an my mom put a blanket over me. Home by 1045. I won shitshow trophy last night.
i bought a pregnancy test with dimes. Is that trashy?
How much time is enough between masturbating and watching little bear?
We have to use a contraceptive. God help the world if another one of us comes into fruition.
My clothes are covered in blood and I feel like I drank a gallon of elephant cum...it's safe to say I'm hungover
I'll make some time for you! I don't know how long you need to get off, but I should only need 2-7 minutes, pending what kind of socks I have on.
I guess I'll just chalk it up as a learning experience and a lot of great sex.
i knew it was love when she pulled a beer out from between her boobs and offered it to me
He sent me a pic stitch collage of all the tit pics I had sexted him this month. It was so sweet!
Apparently last night I yelled "the cops were called on a mother fucker and that mother fucker is me." And then proceeded to exorcise a sandwitch.
I DID MY EXPERIMENTING. FOUR YEARS OF IT. IN HIGH SCHOOL.
It was a recodring of you having sex ! It was like an ape and a dying mongoose at a buffet Xoxoxo
my nextdoor neighbor called me saying "um hey, your mom just stumbled into bed with me and my husband, can you please come get her?"
Randomize
