Alli causes anal leakage. You can find someone to like you if you are fat but no one will like you if you poop yourself.
just walked into the room and her sister said loudly, "do him, or I will."
Just walked by a guy on campus YELLING 'Im still hammered'
I woke up exactly where I passed out... on top of him yet he somehow put his pants back on
You are literally throwing a tangerine right now. Beer pong is not played this way
Woke up w/ the same freshman as last Saturday but we were sober this time. Is that a relationship?
I swear with his long flowing hair and god-like body he looked like Jesus, a bong hitting Jesus
The last thing I remember was riding in a grocery cart with two strangers while a cop pushed us
If there is a ladylike way to throw up in your favorite toilet, I just did it.
this is definitely the first time I've ever had an orgasm and then had potatoes smeared on me within the same hour
Omg my butt feels so much better. Those suppositories are magic. It feels like Jesus fingered me in my sleep.
I brought those bastards cookies so they can deal with my sex noise, fuck them and their roommate asses
I can't come. It's so cold my uterine walls have frozen together like a cherry popsicle.
i have two papers due tomorrow. contemplating if i should take adderall in my anus for full effects
did i tell you guys i finally 69’d for the first time last night? just thought the group chat should know.
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