Can we please have a moment of silence for my reputation?
They had a "who can aim further away from the toilet" contest. I'm now washing piss off my ceiling.
Had a student tell me he misses the old Four Loko. He's in 7th grade. No one is allowed to claim I started drinking too young ever again.
she gave me head while i watched the '98 Rose Bowl on espn classic. Ryan Leaf really was a huge bust
It's getting increasingly easier to use his emotional instability to my advantage. That's about all he has going for him right now.
Woke up Christmas Eve morning with my face smelling like ballsack.. No regrets.
Ok ladies its the usual spring break system. 5 for a guy, 10 for a non-lesbian girl and double points is its a group thing. Hottest guy of the day is an additional 15. GAME ON
Sloppy and selfish. Your 27 and you don't know where my clit is? BYEEE
Oh hell no my vagina is on that screenshot
My morning started with my mom giving me the number for a substance abuse councellor. How's your day going?
So our night ended with 6 cruisers, a fire truck, and an ambulance. Also, lots of blood. How was yours?
ill give you some hints: blood, carnival, fog machine, happy meal.
Finally fucked my buddy's mom!! We are both ten years older and for her it really shows but i hit it!!
Fuck the system, do you have any medieval weapons?
It's fucking 2020, I should be able to watch Netflix in the buff while making brownies without you getting preachy about it.
Randomize
