i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
Its official, cigarettes are now more expensive than weed
just jacked off with my ROTC uniform on. boy i feel like an american.
There is only so much cookie dough and masturbating I can handle in one night.
I just won 10 dollars from out chugging the bar tender and I found out that the baby aint mine in the last hour. I don't even care if l get laid tonight any more.
The view from the bathroom floor this morning is fabulous
I will come over now to take full advantage of you in your vulnerable state.
Fine. I should warn you I just threw up in danas fish tank. Fish are dead. Livers dead. I smell and look like a dead animal. And not showering. So deal with it.
The last thing I want is a chocolate mold of my cock competing with my real cock for time spent in your mouth
he said he did everything he could to puke on his nurses because they were doing everything wrong
Thats admirable.
So mom called me from the hospital laughing her ass off. Apparently my sister is allergic to cocaine...
Is there a coat check? I stole 10 vases of flowers along with two bottles of champagne and I'm not sure what to do with them.
I think curling is the best thing to watch when you're baked.
ill be home in an hour. Be in my bed ready for disappointment
He washed his dick in my kitchen sink after sex. I think he might be a keeper.
Really I don't care what we're doing or watching. Your penis spends way too much time outside of my body.
Randomize
