Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
I will show your tits more attention than Michael Jackson's death.
Too tired to do the dishes so I made mac and cheese in a teapot. There's still some left if you want some...
i know. thats why i need an open bar. i'll get hammered and make a toast about how his dick is like the titanic. large, but full of failure.
Who was that guy I met at your brother's house who had to get stitches in his ass?
She said I walked up to the McDonalds counter and ordered just a cup full of pickles then proceeded to offer some to everyone in the place.
Periouds do not concern me. Biploogival needs are buological needs.
Please delete that video of me blowing you. I will repay you with 100 blowjobs even better than the one I gave you during that video. Please. I am gonna be a grandma one day.
You turned to me, winked, whispered "man the harpoons" and walked out with the fat chick
I'm not going to be your wingman while you are in the hospital.
GOD DAMMIT TARYN WHY DO WE ALWAYS HAVE TO ROB PLACES IN OUR FUTURE PLANS?!
I felt like the hulk waking up from a black out except with munchies
I woke up at 3:30 this morning to pee. Luckily, I didn't have to travel far as I was asleep in my CLOSET on my yoga mat. Good news is I had a pillow...
You coming to give me head and eat tacos?
He has a syndrome called asshole. And it flares up 24/7.
Randomize
