i may have used way too many innuedos last night. i scared him off. but really... how could i pass up "stimulus package" and "flacid economy." don't answer that.
Also I am about to cut a ringtone from "Sex Machine" so James Brown can tell me to "get up, get on up" in the morning
I once woke up to the scream from 'get up offa that thing' and smacked my head on my desk
Can we progress our friendship to a point where i'm at least granted a blowjob allowance?
I just found 3 condoms in my math textbook... in the probability section... Under dependent and independent events...
look. either you want to have late night naked sleep overs or you don't. do not involve dinner and extraneous conversations in this relationship.
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
Ahhh November 1st. National Untagging Day
You just kept holding your breath for a really long time and calling it lung excersizes.
I just passed a drug test. I want to shout that from the top of a mountain. Can we have beers on the top of a mountain?
You know you're fucked up when you decide to pour fireball whiskey in your vegetable beef soup
the straight edge chick smoked with me, because according to her my bowl is pretty
Specially since he wanted to forget that we even touched, which makes it funnier because I don't think you can take back licking someone's butthole...
Can't talk, I'm icing "sorry I barfed on your couch" onto a cookie cake
Idk she seemed really innocent until she snorted that line of vicodin
So I'm buying milk, bread, yogurt & lube. Not awkward at all
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