fighting downstairs. join me tonight to hear their makeup sex. also, let's make skittles vodka.
it was like my fingers were behind enemy lines
my hot student got the clitoris wrong on the lab practical...so it kinda makes me not want to pursue it
just because he can't find it on a cat, doesn't mean he can't find it on you
at which point I apparently ran in and shouted "I made the sex with that one!"
It's summer and yet I still can't have one library session w/o seeing someone who has had their penis in me.
Talking to a male stripper. About the LSAT. Only in Vegas.
I'm drinking wine from the cap of my laundry detergent container, wearing my bed sheet as a cape. How do you think I'm taking it?
I'm sooo hungover. I fell asleep on top of a car in a parking lot last night. New one to add to the list.
We created a neighborhood watchdog drinking game
The paramedics were not my fault this time.
Like we just had a bunch of sex and then he threaded my eyebrows in bed lol. It was amazing
The cat be actin like a 2:30 am poop is the time to tell me all about her thoughts and fears in life. No bitch, this is definitely alone time.
In other news: I massively over-caffeinated this morning. Everything is vibrating and I can SEE THROUGH TIME
he took my bra off with his teeth, THEN decided he just wanted to make out and cuddle. i don't know what the female version of blue balls is, but i've been living with it since 1 a.m.
really who shits their pants then locks themselves out of their apartment? ... I threw my underwear out in a random bathroom
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