We got a party bus for the nite. I found out the hard way why stripper poles are meant for girls.
dont get mad but guess who just got banned for life from dodger stadium
he's drinking beer at home in his underwear tonight and if you want to come over the dresscode is underwear only. And you have to bring beer.
The bartender just hugged us goodnight. I think we go there too often.
Yea he called the cop officer fonzarelli and asked him if he was mad because happy days was off the air. Boom, beaten and arrested
Just watched a guy get through airport security with a full bottle of captain morgan. In my head the entire airport cheered.
I thought my dog was a polar bear. I kept asking how the north pole was this time of year.
Spent 20mins wondering why my roommate wouldn't answer after we were pounding on the door.....Def went to the wrong building.
He's probably the biggest I've seen outside of the porn I vehemently deny watching and he asks if I think he's too small
Yes. I will keep putting the beer into my stomach and eventually the bartender will make a mistake
You rope them in with the looks and the boobs, and I'll bore them into submission with random trivia. We can't lose.
You have not lived until you and a ginger miget chick are jumping and waving your arms in a pitch black bathroom to turn on the motion lights. Yes, today I have officially lived.
You yelled "Everybody!!! Round of applause to Jill for not doing anal!!" Right in front of him.
She's too awesome to dump: she gives me great blow jobs and free Popeyes. You just don't burn a bridge like that.
Dude, I'm thinking today is Single as Fuck Friday because that's how I'm feeling
Randomize
