I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
So I just watched the Lakers/Magic game so I could have something to talk about with him after we have sex this time
so she bought me lunch gave me a blowie then paid for the gas since I drove... I think there's a catch but I'm gonna run with it
Exactly. wat kind of friend would i be if i even pretended to give a shit about ur problems
I've never had a better reason to do blow of a Pittsburgh strippers ass than to try and keep pace with my dad.
Only your wife would write 'for deposit only' on the back of that $1500 check knowing full and well our capabilities of spending it on strippers and booze
How was me telling you it's my mom's birthday a go-ahead to bang my sister???
He wouldn't let me ride him with a Ninja Turtles hat on...
Btw I'm currently writing a paper in a beer garden. Be proud.
Tried to make hash outta one of those keurig machines. I don't know why. Maybe the drunkenness, but now I have mushy bud and no ganja
want me to make you a grilled cheese? I can't guarantee it'll be as good as yours but i'll go down on you afterwards if you want
brb printing out this text and putting it on my bedroom wall
But for real, I had the best sex of my life on that bunk bed
He is such a generous lover, I can look past the fact his name is fucking Bob.
I can't hookup with a guy in my car because it smells like Taco Bell..
I hear my roommate snoring and I feel bad for his girlfriend but then I hear them having sex and I guess it all works out in the end.
Randomize