About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
I jerked off enough times today to safely commit to the fact that im not getting laid tonight
Do you know how hard it is to write about pediatric crohn's when we're trying to figure out the keg situation for graduation?
What do you mean how did you end up there? You told him he had a face you'd like to ride, that's a deal sealer in any language.
Umm, ya, half our class is sitting in starbucks passing around flasks. Yes, flasks. Plural. Going to join them, we're all giving oral presentations in 20. Go hard or go home.
Last time I sleep with a guy with a penchant to fragrance his dick. Every time I sit to pee, I get a whiff of Axe body spray.
Made out with a mannequin all morning in cpr training, so im ready to party
Gross! What the hell is that?!?
It's quite clearly a man posing erotically with multiple packages of bacon.
I think I just legit sprained my wrist from holding myself up while giving a blow J. God dammit come already
Because making bad decisions is what makes our house great and I don't plan on changing that anytime soon.
He asked me for a pic so I sent him a pic of my boyfriends dick.
Well then she has to know whoever you were kissing was in overalls because that's not a detail you just leave out.
He yelled "CARLI LLOYD" and then kicked the cake off the table. Soccer is making monsters out of us.
Unintionally got shitfaced at study group this week. The waitress brought out a fishbowl of long Island iced tea. Challenge accepted.
My boobs weigh the same amount as 25 pancakes
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