Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
His facebook profile says he's interested in men, but i'm choosing to ignore that
If you don't sleep with him after showing him your thong with the bow, I am no longer on your side.
she said if she won the lottery she'd fuck me... isn't that like government funded prostitution?
She said i saw her in the study room, waved, disappeared, came back with a coke from god knows where, and slurred "i have a drinking problem but i ate grits"
I could be wrong, but im pretty sure i jumped off the roof after my lighter.
riding the spinning bikes at the rec after Valentines Day was a baaddddd idea
He panicked, you ducked and I was coming off a 3 day coke binge. It was no one's shining moment.
Yessssss I diiiiid! I enjoyed 38% of it. There are 4 qualifications and 2 were good. 1. There is a penis in my vagina (Pass) 2. It's a big penis (Fail) 3. The sex is long and exciting and makes me sweat and have 6 pack abs (fail) 4. I got off (uhhh potential to pass...)
Pretty sure I sang "What Makes You Beautiful" to some random guy in a parking lot last night...
But the sex is so much better when he already has a girlfriend
I only blacked out one night of three if that isn't fucking personal growth idk what is
I was chasing disarono with Bacardi and watching ice cube movies. It would have been an epic birthday if I wasn't by myself and actually had some decent friends.. Hint. Asshole.
I just used a gift card from my in-laws to buy their daughter a vibrator. What even are morals?
There's just something classy about smoking a blunt in a prom dress.
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