I understand how i shit in my shoes, but explain why you were wearing them.
Saw a pregnant woman get a lap dance last night. I love the south.
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
She had her underwear around her neck. No one can tell me i'm a slut now.
I lost it last night. That was humiliating. Cincinnati is now covered in my puke.
Everything sucks i just wanna cry and smoke a bowl and pet my cat and die. All at the same time
God I hope my hair dresser doesn't realize that all these hairspiration pictures are from gay porn blogs on tumblr.
She is still a psychotic unstable bitch, and is therefore PERFECT drinking game fodder
Can you come get Dustin he's putting taco bell fire sauce on cigarettes trying to light them again.
I'm pmsing and only have one functional foot
I put a bagel at the end of my bed so every time I want a bite I have to do a sit up
I keeping finding meatballs in random places
You 2012 self promised me that you would do LSD with me, and it's 2015 now. So.
Plus, I'm basically a doctor, so what could go wrong.
I sucked his dick by a creek, how romantic.
I JUST WANT TO HAVE AWKWARD SEXUAL EXPERIENCES WITH HIM.
Randomize
