Grown men dancing to Spice Girls and a girl wearing one shoe. I belong here
Just downloaded the entire Justin Bieber album sober.. I think you know how I'm doing.
she was mad because i didn't remember our fuckaversary. fuck buddies are getting too demanding..
I left puerto rico a week ago and my vagina still smells like coconut.
I make your heart skip a beat like that pivotal moment when you open a public toilet lid
you better take a shot tonight for every cat you have ever seen and wanted. this is a lot of cats.
I dont know. Theres no way you can be ready for the sex hurricane that will consume you.
Don't ever feel guilty about what you put in your mouth best advice my gma ever gave me lmao
I know now that the cab driver can get me a 10 dollar blow job. I'm practically a local.
I have just been informed that my company has ray guns. I WORK FOR ACTUAL BOND VILLAINS. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
This morning he fucked me while I was brushing my teeth. So I kept brushing as he thrusted. Then I brushed his teeth with my toothbrush while he was still in me. So hygienic.
never planned on seeing last weekend's one night stand again, much less be on the same plane as him..
Do you own a cuff key and know where Karen lives?
Can I come over and get it in, take a nap in ur bed, grab some poptarts and then leave?
You haven't lost that air of class about you...
No offense, but I don’t think I would want to see him in anything skimpier than a hazmat suit.
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