I was staring at you from my window across the quad. I wanted to let you know so it's not creepy
Needless to say, wine tasting turned into wine chugging
Spaghetti and Car Bombs, good idea or what will end up on the bar in a few minutes?
Do you know how awkward it is to call the bar from last night and ask if they found my leggings?
Dude, you need to come clean your dates vomit off the ceiling. What in the hell were you guys doing?!
Now that you're back together are you gonna tell him you set his stuff on fire?
He's so young, I keep getting a mental image of him in footie pajamas. It's cute but it's wrong. Or is it?
i found out she really is a mensa member
so she was the smartest passed out on the floor hair encrusted in vomit girl at the party
Can we fangirl? Can we have fangirl Tuesdays?
Sure lol what's that?
Oh, dear, sweet Laura. Please start singing A Whole New World. I have Aladdin's part, you're Jasmine.
Why?
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I just bought emergency deodorant at Dominick's and put it on in front of a homeless man while waiting for the bus. He laughed and said 'girl, you a mess'. This is my life.
I came home wearing somebody's thong. If you're missing one message me privately.
you face planting the wall was epic
did you at least save my tooth
Banged a girl last night wearing nothing but my Team USA Olympic jersey. I think it's safe to say that nut was for America.
Let the healthy eats/juice cleanse begin. Today is day 1
Have you cleansed yourself of the boy yet?
He called my IUD an IED, and said that’s why I had bomb pussy.... I didn’t correct him
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