Why is there a living, breathing cow on your front porch?
Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
I woke up on a futon with 2 stolen budwiesers in my purse, 5 extra bucks, a sucker stuck to my shoe, one sock, and a stolen copy of the zombie survival guide
please tell me this is not legit
There's a warrant out for his arrest for throwing a mannequin through a bus stop.
I will miss his soup and his dick the most
My fingers feel amazing. Their going like 100 MPH!!
HOLY SHIT. SHIT THAT IS HOLY. HOLY OF THE SHIT.
Believe it or not, that's part of the whole 'best friend' thing. It's not just yelling at me for making you leave the club early or taking the couch bc I'm doing sex while you're doing bjs.
Was just walking through the park by the river. Saw some random in a tree, we climbed up, blazed with him and bought a bag. In the tree. Real shit.
Want to come over and rub aloe on my tits?
Who wouldn't want a man who can knock a guy out but also loves the bachelor.
It's the best of both worlds
Oh, and one of the worst parts... his name was Mario. I fucked a Nintendo character.
I tried to prevent a bar fight. By convincing a guy whacked out on Molly to slap the ass of everyone who was arguing and shout "WOO" each time. I'm proud, surprised, and intrigued that it calmed everyone down so quickly...
Nothing kills the mood like him going to slap my ass and he hits his balls at the same time
So... Sex in my rain boots last night. Trashy or a great show of character?
If it was with a guy, trashy. Sex with a girl is never trashy.
is it weird that i just witnessed the marriage of someone ive had sex with on multiple occasions?
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