yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
What are you talking about? And how drunk are you?
Both
I threw up so much beer last night that my puke had a nice head on it.
I figured he was gay when I walked in on him working out to Flirty Girl Fitness.
are you sure you're not interested? he's the dunkin donuts employee of the month.
mom just asked if we are going to need more kaluha as she pulls 5 out of the cupboard. this xmas might kill me
I can'nr wwn explain this nihght . So amnt dixks. Shitttttt.
Now accepting hypotheses about how i managed to get a bruise between my boobs....
How do i tell my boyfriend " I'm taking the two weeks im in Europe to fuck my way across 9 countries" in a way where we will still be together?
for the record, graham crackers won't get the taste of cock out of your mouth. also we're out of graham crackers
I apparently made a "health and fitness" subcatagory called "drugs" on mint at some point. I used it to catagorize all of my nyc atm withdrawls for $60 haha
It'd probably just be a lot of profanity and hyperventilation and deteriorating into tears anyways
so just a regular conversation then
Oh my god there are animals here. There are actusal animals trying to get him. A giraffe is trying to get in. A giraffee is trying to get in. Is ridiculouss.
I hope every time you eat hashbrowns you think about me, the awesome sex we had and how great we could have been.
I wasn't talking about him I meant his penis! Its not a pet
Oh. Well it should be. I like petting it.
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