you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
It's really awkward/depressing when you are wearing heels larger than his dick
Found out my brother is now my eskimo brother...One of my proudest times as a brother
Ive been using palmolive to shower with for he last week, dont tell me about not having money. Im heading to the bar r u going.
Either way you look at it, I'm a slut. But either way I look at it, I'm having a fucking blast.
I can't do a walk of shame with a sombrero full of baby chickens
that's why you don't digest questionable powders from girls wearing tutus at a dirty club
He literally said to me "go ahead and answer that text message while I eat you out"... Maybe I AM the relationship type...
I've just never had a dinner guest strut in, go directly to my bathroom, vomit.. then come out demanding whiskey and food.
lol i'm looking through my photos and there's this giant section of just dudes wearing murses
Ever the responsible adult, I just realized that today is the Obamacare deadline, but I'm too high to handle insurance now.
So the revenge porn my ex posted just resulted in a contract with a gay porn company. I'm going to make $8,000 this weekend. That would a breakup checkmate. Are you joining me in the legislative committee hearing tomorrow?
I kept telling you not to give them blowjobs, but you kept screaming back, "it's okay, we're friends on facebook!"
he just asked me that if he was a penguin and I was a penguin if I would fuck him
I love you.
Bad choice
Randomize
