the sham wow guy got arrested for beating up a hooker.
Everytime she opens her mouth it's like a fucking terrorist attack on my life.
You and i never got to the, we dont care what we look like friend-stage. you know? like not brushing your teeth stage.
sorry im really high
the pool opens at 11. by 1115 the ambulance had been called.
his facial hair looked like he just ate out someone's ass
Just walk-of-shame'd past fifteen little girls at summer camp. Take a good look girls, I am you in twelve years.
Damn it, I know in the morning I'm going to regret eating out of the trash...
Nobody knows who the hobo or dude who whipped out his balls is
no you're not allowed back
come on. everbeers was a great idea. you fucks had a great night
I feel bad for the cleaning lady. All you can smell is latex and Jaegermeister
Thank you for calling me on to a higher level of debauchery. fuck anyone who says we aren't good for each other
That guy drinking savagely was actually at his buddy's gay bachelor party in the male stripper section. He came over to the chicks side so we drank with him.
He had some sort of penis-related post traumatic stress disorder, but body shots seemed to wake him up
How are you getting in?
I know some influential drag queens
Are you awake? I feel like I need to confess my sins to someone not on this side of the country.
It's going to turn into you and me throwing down in a devastating lip-synch battle while everyone else stands around awkwardly.
Randomize
