just woke up in the beanbag bin at walmart
i'm making a list of conversation topics in my blackberry so the ride won't be so awkward
i made it my goal to pee in the sink of every apartment we went to last night. i didnt use the toilet once
What happened to "I wouldnt even touch her with a ten foot pole"?
Her vagina devoured it.
I suppose drinking a cosmo at lunch alone can't look good but I mean... sometimes it's just necessary
It's great having no responsibilities. In normal life I would be freaking the fuck out right about now. But the only worry I have from last night is where i got this shower caddy full of cookies. God I love college.
I woke up and watched my kitten suck on his nipple. Way too hungover to intervene. He thought it was me, so he just giggled and mumbled "mmm girl."
Seriously? God I hope he wasn't lactating.
......... Poor kitty
I have no idea. But that is beside the point bc in vegas I'm a pro vball player from Ireland and a veterinarian on the weekends
FridayRule: If it takes you longer than 5 minutes to find a parking spot, you don't have class today
I think I've just evolved into some kind of vodka fueled monster
It is very possible that having sex with you just now just got me into Yale
I just got St Patricks day and the day after St Patricks day off, wich I'm pretty sure is as close to a raise as I'll ever get.
Im selling my dirty underwear to pay for that cruise. NO JUDGEMENT . I love you lol ❤❤ also dont tell anyone
If you come home to me in lingerie and you start vacuuming...I need to reevaluate my priorities
i ate her out in full view of all her roomates. the word awkward doesnt even cover it.
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