you washed your face with toilet water last night.. i tried to stop you but you wouldn't have it.
yeah so i didn't even realize i was on meth until the next morning
Just used a champagne bottle to outline a trigonometric circle for math 104.. should i give up on life now or later?
They had to restock the bar 3 times before midnight. There is a bridesmaid dress hanging in a tree outside.
My mom and dad are smoking a joint while lecturing me on what to bring and how to act in Europe. I'll finish this glass of wine and head over.
Power hour was a bad idea. It turned into power 4 hours, then power puke. Then power sleep till 3.
your like the ambassador to my penis.
We sent off fireworks off in the taco bell drive through. They're taking it way too seriously.
There's a drag queen here that reminds me strongly of you. You should try crossdressing.
5 hours of volunteer work playing with puppies and banned from the frat I hate most as 'punishment'... Besides the ER trip, I'm not seeing the bad in this situation
How did it feel to just observe all the people blacking out usually you're on the other end of things
I felt like I was at the zoo
Just took physics exam. I think this is one of those 'chuck it in the fuck-it bucket and become an art major' days
You can't honestly expect me to maintain an erection when you have the Glen Beck show on
I just hooked up with a one legged Australian guy. Hooray diversity!
I just found a condom in my jolly ranchers bag. This is a good omen.
Randomize
