You gave him head? He fingered you? A little bit of make out?
WHAT THE FUCK ITS LIKE YOU WERE THERE
life is all about the fine print - all i wanted was a fucking pony.
wasted. watching meteors, awesome idea i ever had, see 2 for every 1 with ma double vision
I woke up to him eating me out, listening to classical music.
i told you the emergency thong was a good idea.
Yeah he doesn't get it. We had to change the subject to Keanu reeves before someone got hurt.
The guy in the cast riped the tap off the keg and hit steve with it
Definitely just put my car on cruise control so I could stick my head out of the sunroof while driving to taco bell.
he knocked a glass of water onto my bed and then said that he should get to sleep on the dry side because he was "a guest"
Some people say 6pm is too early to get drunk. To them I say this dinner is delicious.
Just sent my cousin to buy me a new bra cause mine is zip tied to a bar in the middle of nowhere Iowa
I forgot to pack a bra for work today...you would not believe the extremes i've had to go through in order to keep these nips from my coworkers
I felt like... 50% confused and 50% like a slow roasted flip flop.
I witness him finger a girl behind the dj decks yet I'm still going to meet up with him. Wtf is my life
We were dancing and then he pointed to the club floor and there was money that I dropped everywhere. That was the nicest thing someone has ever done for me.
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