You should see what I'm doing to your stuffed animals
ugh. people who use coupons make me wanna punch a baby.
Ughh on my way to the bathroom now... literally just puked on myself and cleaned it off with a hot dog bun... I love tailgate
she peed on how many people?
I just negotiated a blow job for an interview.
He just asked me to pee through my panties while he watched. I might need more tequila for this one.
Ya bro it was wild. Hey, is latex digestible?
just run out there and shit all over the driveway when he comes.. and then point at him
He's used the term "balls deep" 3 times in the first hour. Thanks a lot, Plenty of Fish.
I just saw that blonde chick you wanna bang rolling down the hall wearing a Thor mask..
Wow. We're meant to be..
Ok not good, my info has definitely been submitted to this sugar daddy website before.
Dude you asked your tattoo if it wanted to go swimming
So im waiting for someone at grand central and i look up AND THE ENTIRE BALCONY IS FILLED WITH BOY SCOUTS I AM TERRIFIED
Please come to class. I miss you and I have a horse mask
He showed up completely drunk with a 30 of PBR and ten cans of Spam. I like this kid.
Randomize
