Most awkward thing ever: Meeting your BattleShits opponent post war.
im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
the dr. explained that the first big patch is called a herald patch since it's biggest. So his name is Harold the Patch.
Wow. You named your rash.
he doesn't care that i have a boyfriend so why should i?
logic in its finest
hey, i'm all for honesty but let's not get carried away
I just found what appears to be a tooth in my purse...anybody missing one?
Did you know you could bring s cooler of beer to the nail salon?
We were dancing and she was clawing my stomach like a fat kid getting to a half broken pinata.
I find it very uncomfortable that I need to ask you to stop sending me pictures of your stomach
I feel like his penis would have a weird haircut because he does.
I think I'm still a little drunk from Sunday Funday and I just changed for a date in my car. wish me luck.
Congrats on graduating and I'm in a cab and need someone to helps keeping me up, do you mind
All my female reproductive organs were screaming HELL YES last night.
I AM SO HORNY, I AM GOING TO DIE. I NEED SOMEONE TO WISH MY VAGINA A MERRY CHRISTMAS.
He went down on me while I was on the phone with my grandma.
Randomize
