I went to blockbuster, where I always go when I need to soul searching
Despondent, hopeless, I decide on vantage point, because I vaguely resemble matthew fox (let me believe this, please)
It was cheaper to buy then rent, so now I'm stuck w/ a wretched hangover and I own this shit movie
Haym$ered
turn off your phone and go to bed
It is obvious to me now why clam chowder & beer aren't a good combo.
Katy Perry is on a Proactiv commercial. That "I kissed a girl" shit is so much less hot now.
made out with three guys on the first night of college orientation, just imagine what joys all of next year will hold
trapped on the roof of the strip club. help
The party got hot, we all started raging, took off some clothes, someone threw me in the shower and we all kept raging. Nude Rager, I was there at the point of conception.
If I don't go to Australia I'm using that towards a new car. If I do I'll use it to buy a koala.
So I just sneezed blood everywhere. On the upside. After yesterday I feel way more confident AND I give even less of a fuck.
It must be love. I'm deleting my porn for him.
Tinder in Coventry is like browsing a gallery of mugshots from Azkaban
dude idk where I am. fuckin like. there wheat field and a horizon and shit. I think I got on a bus? some dude named Sam gave me a pamphlet about Jesus.
Bring shot glasses to the final. Don't ask questions.
I'm not just straddling the line between love and hate, I'm dry humping the shit out of it
Kinda thinking about going to my moms wedding high
Randomize
