you took a scissor and started screaming "I WANNA KNOW WHAT ITS LIKE TO BE BALD"
Oh my god. Oh my god. Oh my god. I drunk emailed a professor on friday. Oh my god. Oh my god.
He just kept telling me how to do certain things. It was like I was fucking my sex ed teacher
We started hooking up and a group of freshmen outside my window started chanting my name. Encouraging yet distracting
Why is there not a 'day after acid' genre. Or even a pandora station or something.
thanks so much for stopping me from telling him i want to have sex with him while i proceeded to hookup with the air.
I'm still waiting for my blazer that I left at your apartment, you owe me a blowjob for every day from Thursday on that it's late.
Doing Jager Bombs on a Sunday morning is justified...How else is my team going to win?
In that case, I'll try 2 find a date. But my options are AA friends or fuck buddies.
he came in the room wearing gloves & rapping while eating a corndog
knight in shining armor
I never thought I would have to put a band-aid on my penis.
We need to get walkie talkies for when we're drunk so if we are at different parties or lost we can talk
So how do u get your coat out of the coat room when someone is fucking on it?
his mom walked in while he was eating me out. and my vag was facing the door. luckily his face was in it.
The neighbor just poured gasoline on his 2 brush fires and proceeded to shoot Roman candles at them 🤔
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