Dude i fell asleep inside of her
thats awesome
just smoked a blunt while listening to nsync. i now know what my childhood was missing.
i can't tell if you're serious or not, but 420 is gonna be pirate themed
The girl with a dislocated arm just did an assisted keg stand. You will never have an excuse again.
Whatever. It was high school. Back then I'd blow anyone who had enough room between their chest and their steering wheel for my head to fit.
I'm not sure if you saw my recent facebook update, but I have already put the Radio Flyer wagon to good use. I had someone pull me to the nearest bar.
I could only remember yelling "rip it down" as he ninja jumped off the bed, kicked the wall, and superman punched the fire alarm off the ceiling.
I've always wondered why you never put the hotel room in your name...
Now I can't say for certain but I'm 90 percent are I bathed myself with dog shampoo last night
and then I partied with my new dealers deaf pit bull. All around a good night I'd say...
how don't worse things happen to you?
I love you but I don't want to see you naked.
I know he’s a bad decision but he's casual, his penis is amazing and his technique is on point.
She said I'm like warm bathroom-sink water. There's nothing necessarily wrong with me, but she doesn't exactly want to "drink me in"
She's like the sister I never had that I want to bang.
I swear to god he thought my ass was a bag of wine last night.
Am i obligated to tell my sister her girlfriend was my one night stand three months ago?
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