You drink too much
No, I drink just the right amount - too often.
it was worse than that time i tried giving evan head 4 days post nose job.
He was eating me out on the dryer...and his mom walked in with her laundry basket...
He wasn't the only one with a full load.
there are 10 yearolds here who keep calling me on the elbow rule!
Wait are they playing beer pong to?
making your facebook status TEQUILA is like basically saying "im easy tonight. feel free to take advantage"
Was this before, or after you took my brand new bag of shredded cheese, and "Made it rain"?
Yeah he doesn't get it. We had to change the subject to Keanu reeves before someone got hurt.
they night at the roxbarryed us. came out of nowhere,bought us shots, and then the big one licked my hand? we got out of that noise.
DIN'T JUSGE NE.
She makes walking on a treadmill look like a porno. I wish I could send over shots as an ice breaker.
That's effing brilliant. We should start a business.
Go for it! You're young. Have fun. Be somebody's expensive hobby like Anastasia Steele.
Didn't want you to think it had been open season on my vagina since we broke up.
You fell asleep standing up against the shower wall
Weddings might be fun but they are not getting fucked in the wilderness fun.
He's a security blanket. A security blanket who FUCKS.
Randomize
