i was shrooming and she was sobbing. i was trying to be sympathetic, but i could see the veins working like worms under her skin. and then her face stripped down to the muscle.
what was she crying about?
i wanna say it was the lack of skin on her face but maybe she lost her job.
were having a shit on karen session at work but then she walked in so we used code names instead and she tried to join in like she knew them
Take one last look at my face, because I'm drinking it off tonight.
It felt like his penis had an endoskeleton.
all i know is that they all tuched my pee cup last night.
Just got done reading an 11 page essay for class. Took me three fucking days and the only thing I have highlighted is the name "Alexander Cockburn"
My favorite part about you getting arrested is having to explain the prosthetic leg in the front seat.
Just found a quarter that has been stuck to my boob since at least last night.
We are lost. Everyone is drunk and it all went downhill after we iced the bus driver.
Don't worry about it. Anal sex isn't always sunshine and wildflowers.
That's not your dick yours is smaller. Nice try.
Wait why do you have a pic of someone else's dick in your phone?
Wait also totally unrelated but can horses sit down?
I just tried to picture one and I don't think they can cause I can't envision it
i told her i loved her afterwards and she said "i know," kissed me, and got up to start making breakfast.
dude, she han solo'd you. keep her.
side note: on a scale of 1-10, how bad an idea is it to hook up with 9 cats guy?
Let's FaceTime each other while we shotgun beers
Randomize
