She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
P.S. theres no milk for breakfast, but theres plenty of beer or red wine. you decide.
just taught 3 girls from korea how to fist pump on chat roulette.
I don't give a shit about soccer but I'm really excited about drinking at 7 in the morning
In the ER. 2nd degree burns. Drunken attempt to make gasoline scented candles.
She said I came to for a minute, shouted IHOP!! and then shook my head and said no before passing out again
As I climbed in the bathroom window from the room I noticed both him rommates staring and talking about me in the hall...
I started making breakfast to subdue the hangover and last of the shrooms and only got as far as eating a half frozen pierogi out of a dixie cup.
I just heard "I just let you finger me on Megabus, I clearly don't have standards".
I think when Jesus turned water into wine it was a sign that we should get drunk off Sangria tonight. Do it for Jesus. He died for your sins.
sooo trippy being back in town after 5 years. if you had asked me in high school who would be future coke heads, i would have been way off
Who put the fucking tampon in my Mike's hard lemonade?
At least you didn't get an invite in the mail to your fuck buddy's baby shower like I just did. My life is a sitcom
"Accidentally" bump into him after class.
I'm gonna "accidentally" put his dick in my mouth.
Dear Ex-Sister-in-Law, I never thought I would say this, but I just found your panties in my back seat. Please remind me to give them back.
Randomize
