They are making fun of natty and blackberries.
Tell them they are ugly.
You'll be happy to know that I did indeed fracture my rib in a sex related injury
Just got my period. This just makes my beach escapade totally even that much more ok.
I had to talk to the cops at my front door in a bathrobe, with the buttplug still in.
I'm in my bed. Snow angles in fresh sheets. don't even try to get me out tonight.
I just sent my ex off to a party, threw a condom at him, and told him to make good choices.
She gave you a handy in the bar and you were surprised she was good with a dick?
Hahah good point
as much as I don't like snorting drugs, I would totally be fine with someone doing a line off my ass. that's just a whole new up
I'm pretty sure I just orgasmned my way out of paying for that weed
Watching the awkward tinder date at the table next to mine is the most action I've had in months, so there's that.
If the smell of things stopped me from putting things in my mouth. I wouldn't be popular with Grindr guys.
You probably shouldn't do that...but if you do take pictures
I got fucked in a bat mobile this morning. Being slutty rules.
As a gift to myself for being so awesome at being single, I'm going to buy a vibrator
Dude we were sitting at my place stoned as fuk then someone knocks on the door and it was my neighbor giving me a huge box of cookie dough. Magic of weed.
Randomize
