Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
"Morning after" poops are always like, interesting.
we've progressed from teabagging to lighting eachothers asses on fire. this cannot be a good path.
i wanted to tell my neighbors to shut up it was 4am, but listening to her rag on him for his minute man routine was actually entertaining
thanks for showing me a good time......and your penis a few times. Thanks especially for that.
he designed a suit out of pillows to protect himself when he fell.
engineering majors are such efficient drunks.
What part of I'm done do you not understand? Im not going to send you sex photos to prove I've moved on..
casual night just sitting in the kitchen at 2 am eating stale chips and hot sauce while my friends younger sister is cleaning all the blood off my body
His dad gives me dirty looks whenever I come over though. I think it's because I eat his food and have sex with his son.
She referred to my balls as rotund and handsome
Thank you for trusting your ovaries to me
Listening to sad Lana Del Rey songs together is an integral part of the lesbian bonding process
Nothing says girls night like wine cheese and pregnancy tests 😂
He sent me a dick pic from a port-o-potty in Boston. If that's not love Idk what is.
woke up hungover this morning lying in a water raft covered in water.. i dont know if i should consider this good or bad
Randomize