just threw up in the bushes outside my lecture hall. sometimes i hate the freedom college gives you.
Yeah like at least with a penis what you see is what you get with a vagina there can always be a surprise inside
Sorry about your blender, your tiolet, your weed, and your dog...
I'm eager to hear this explaination.
okay, certainly we can't screw this up, and even as I type, I know we will
noo you weren't that drunk. you just knocked the grill over and couldn't get the key in the door, so you climbed through the window. success.
4 random people called me telling me they found him sleeping in the fetal postion on a driveway 45 minutes after we lost him
Heed the warning of the ghost of Oktoberfest present: German beer is soooooooo much better than our watered down children's piss. also lost all my clothes and am wearing lederhosen the rest of the trip.
Home safe. Took me everything not to stop and pick up some random cat that looked like an ocelot tho.
It's a strange mix of shame and pride every time I pee at the bar and still see my lipstick on the bathroom wall...
Now I just sit back and wait to give ass birth to pure evil.
And at the semi-adult age of 25 I have shit my pants. Not even drunk, just really late to work. Is this real life?
Video footage says last night I reincarnated as stripper Shania Twain... Man, I feel like a (slutty) woman.
YOU ARE STRONGER THAN YOUR VAGINA
So I was laying on the couch reading a book and he texted me. All I saw was the image of him spitting on my vagina last night in the moonlight. I gagged.
He bought me a bottle of Malibu. I think I could love this guy.
I've loved people for a lot less.
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