Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
have you ever noticed that homeless people never have acne. suck it proactive
Bt dubs, I still have cuts on my arm from when you attacked me with a dildo on Saturday night.
The freshman came home at 9 this morning with one heel, no pants, and a strangers sweatshirt covered in tequila-scented vomit. I think we're done corrupting her for a while.
He wouldnt stop screaming that he wanted a trashcan WITH a lid. Whats so necassary about a lid
What's the point of having 3 fuck buddies when their periods all seem to sync up
its totally unfair that im just as ill-prepared as a 16 year old but there's no tv show for 25 and pregnant.
We just licked a sour creme and onion chip for salt for a tequila shot. Our vacation has officially begun.
It's ok. I will share any beautiful men that I drug and leave unconscious on my bed. I'm that kind of friend.
Well. Your father was, shall we say, privately surfing the Internet when he found a video of you and Kevin. This was on a very public website honey.
By the way, Kevin! OMG good catch honey!
Just remember that I named his dick Robo-cock before he got into the sheriff's department.
I went on an adventure and now we have more food.
Well, really we just have fire sauce and cookies. But they're edible.
Hey don't blame me, picking what flavor of condom to put on my dick is a very difficult selection process
what happened last night?!
you took a shot and then laid down on our kitchen table and passed out.. then when we tried to move you to the couch you screamed "no! i love tables"
That guy u hooked me up with kept calling me james while were doing it...
Randomize
