Just crossed the line with my beat friends girl twinsie. Didn't realize tillz afta how much the look alike and an thougholy creeped out. Thanks ciroc
you made pancakes with beer, you said they were good. then you threw up 15 minutes later
I just remember taking her cat for a walk around 3 am then falling asleep in a slide at the park
Bath mats should not be used at mops. they don't work. consider this a drunk psa
Just a heads up, the coffee pot is filled with Jager.
He probably smells like baby powder and sexual identity crisis.
Her mom is home on her lunch break. Guess who's hiding In the Closet?
Birthday Treasure Hunt was to follow the clues. At each spot there was a stick on tattoo and a shot and at the end there was 2 cases of beer. I have 13 tattoos and don't remember turning 18.
If you're staying here tonight, you need to promise me you won't make another bonfire in the lounge room. My girl is still pissed about that.
He picked me up in the very car he devirginized me in, his moms toyota.
Agree to hang out with him and then take a gigantic shit right on him. Or if youve forgiven him for being a fucker maybe make out with him.
Not sure if buying Twisted Teas for the alcoholics posted up outside the gas station counts as paying it forward but I am optimistic.
I danced shirtless on a platform with a fucking stripper who went to MIT
chipped my right front tooth on a toilette. i figure if i keep drinking i won't care for at least 2 days
Look get the dick out ur mouth and answer the phone
Randomize
