her vagina looked like bernie madoff
his text ended with ... everyone knows dot dot dot equals infer sexy time
i wish my penis had a tongue
whats wrong with me. i have a coffee mug of wine in the library and i'm doing homework
I got a chicken sandwich and a frosty out of her. Better then having sex
I'm starting therapy this week.. Taylor Swift music isn't cutting it for me anymore
At 4am he sent "uree asss ize anmazin"
Come down. You're the next contestant on this bowl.
Yeah dude, it's amazing. Be careful though, that shit is really really intense. Like it's way more intense than normal shit...
I took two and feel like crushed diamonds spread over glazing marmalade
I don't know what I wash first. My body or my puke painted car. People are judging me as I drive by.
I don't know where he learned to eat pussy but I thought I was going blind
I'm all dressed in my outfit from last night, and I'm not even the sluttiest person in Walmart right now. God bless Miami.
Once he bit me I drew the fucking line.
So this is what bad decisions tastes like...
Hitting up all my dealers for my birthday grams is paying off
Randomize
