Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
She told me a very interesting story, complete with pantomimes, about how she got a habanero seed in her vag
There is a girl in bio drinking beer out of a starbucks cup with a straw
I even resorted to pole dancing with the street sign. I have an extra $20 now because I think people were paying me to leave.
OMG A WOMANS PROSTETIC ARM JUST FELL OFF AT BAGGAGE CLAIM
im never drinking wine from a person in a wet suit and goggles ever again.
So far we've hooked up on a pool table, on a public bathroom counter and now in a little league baseball dugout. We haven't even made to a house yet.
They have a stripper pole on their deck. Normal.
I just want to have normal problems like what kind of puppy to get, or should I pay a hooker to fuck Scott, or even a dilemma about fucking Twizzlers. I don't know.
Buying her a drink is like giving a seagull a French fry, all you're gonna do is get annoyed and shit on
I don't know if I should feel proud or ashamed of myself...ashamed for making myself a drink at 6:15am or proud for actually being awake that early.
Hahaha more like walk of pride. You entered the lions den last night.
Beard. Chest hair. Job.
The holy trinity.
Why is the floor coated in a 2 inch blanket of popcorn??
mid-sex she goes "oh my god. you aren't even going to remember my name in the morning, are you?". And i was so wasted that i straight up told her "honestly, I don't even remember your name right now"
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