This girl is more easily done than said...
put your butt on the phone this is a booty call
They need to add a relationship status option on fb that says "having the baby of..."
i used baking grease as lip gloss
well most of my day revolves around power hour
we banged on the home plate. i wasnt even aware of the significance of where we were until afterwards hahaha
he sent me a winky sad face. i cannot deal this level of pathetically needy flirtatiousness.
His threats seemed pretty legit for a 6 year old
He asked if he could fuck me while on chat roulette.
he's listed in a fb relationship with a girl born in 1993. i'm too drunk to do the math on that one, but i am sober enough to know that's illegal
It took me four clicks to get to 2009 on his profile. This can't work.
I'm drugging my best friend. I'm like a whole new level of bitch.
Currently smoking a blunt with my one night stand's mom. I don't know how I should feel about this.
my question is who was more confortable? You sleeping on the floor or me tweeting from a bush?
HE MIGHT HAVE YOUR BUTTHOLE, BUT HE CANT HAVE YOUR HEART. THATS MINE.
Randomize
