Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
Im already sauced. Have been for hours. Its kinda my thing.
Single handedly the worst sex I've ever had just went down. Its like we both laid there after word-less thinking about the other " could they be any worse in bed" ?
Housing came buy and confiscated our shopping cart :(
he just asked if we wanted to go to an arts and crats club with him tomorrow. every day it becomes harder for me to defend his sexuality
After we fucked he shhhh'd me and said your welcome
I thought your voice was coming from the walls. I've never been so relieved to find you naked in a closet
The cops knocked on our door just to ask us if we were really having a no-pants party.
Walked back to my room from the bus last night and all I see is 3 of my friends on the porch chugging whiskey and then throwing up in unison
I keep shaking cocoa puffs out of my hair. Best Sunday Funday ever.
did i just pee glitter
Just had to tell a NYC cop I was doing the Dougie in a houndstooth jumper so he could find me in the security video.
Are you ok? Who pooped in my office?
He’s like an awkward walking penis that has a personality attached
You offered him a “Sorry I Blew Your Brother” Blowjob. How does that make it right?
I promised him it would be better than the one I gave his brother which is really nice of me since their actually only half brothers and his brother is cuter
Randomize
